Retarded Grandparents

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The following was supposedly reported by a teacher, grammar mistakes and all.  Author Unknown.

After Christmas, a teacher asked her young pupils to write an essay on how they spent their holiday away from school.  One child wrote the following:

We always spend the holidays with Grandma and Grandpa.  They used to live in a big brick house but Grandpa got retarded and they moved to Batemans Bay where everyone lives in nice little houses, and so they don’t have to mow the grass anymore!

They ride around on their bicycles and scooters and wear name tags because they don’t know who they are anymore.  They go to a building called a wreck centre, but they must have got it fixed because it is all okay now.  They do exercises there, but they don’t do them very well.  There is a swimming pool too, but they all jump up and down in it with hats on.

At their gate, there is a doll house with a little old man sitting in it.  He watches all day so nobody can escape.  Sometimes they sneak out and go cruising in their golf carts!  Nobody there cooks, they just eat out.  And, they eat the same thing every night…early birds.  Some of the people can’t get out past the man in the doll house.  The ones who do get out, bring food back to the wrecked centre for pot luck.

My Grandma says that Grandpa worked all his life to earn his retardment and say I should work hard so I can be retarded someday too.  When I earn my retardment, I want to be the man in the doll house.  Then I will let people out, so they can visit their grandchildren.

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By Carol North

Author, blogger, Carol North writes about pets, children and travel and looks forward to sharing her years of experience. Carol is definitely a sassy senior and says you'll have to ask her husband about the sexy part.

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