Where Do You Look for Happiness?

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Searching for Happiness in Holiday Madness

It is fascinating watching people search for happiness as they rush about during the holidays. Whether finding the perfect bird to grace the Thanksgiving table or planning enough dishes to impress strangers at the parties, everything begins as soon as the last ghost of Halloween is vanquished.

No sooner is the Thanksgiving meal depleted than the stores fill with frantic shoppers on Black Friday. Surely there, happiness will arrive in the form of the Sale of the Century! The excitement lasts until shoppers discover the big sale is for no more than one or two of an item. Those are quickly swept up by the hard core shoppers who slept outside the stores – who arrived seconds after stores closed in anticipation of the mad rush when they reopened.

Too often that is when the fights break out. Greed replaces holiday glee. Aunt Sarah MUST have that scarf – no other will do. Dad, well there is no telling what he will think, if he doesn’t get that new hunting jacket, in just that color. It isn’t Aunt Sarah or Dad – it is greed humming its song.

Searching for Happiness in a Box

Christmas Day arrives. Kiddies tear into a mountain of gifts. Adults wait for that big moment when they are tearfully thanked for their generosity. Instead, a three-year old, overwhelmed by the largess, pipes up, “Is that all?” Joy turns to anger at the very idea of the child wanting more and the big moment is spoiled. They searched for happiness in a box and found the box empty.

Adult gifts are passed around and opened with appreciative oohs and ahhs. Wrappings are gathered and tossed into the trash and everyone sits down to another ridiculously over-sized meal. More often than not, solemn faces surround the table. We wonder where the happiness for which we planned all these weeks disappeared?

Why Do We Plan For Happiness?

Humans are funny creatures. We are the only beings on this planet who work, plan, worry, and entreat others for our happiness. We strive to make fortunes only to discover happiness got lost along the way. Once we achieve success, we become suspicious. Are ‘friends’ truly friends? Is the smile on that person’s face because she truly likes us, or is it because he needs a loan, which neither intends to repay. After all, we now have money, so there is no need to be given the courtesy of repaying loans.

Yet, after working long hours, struggling with little regard to possibly destroying our families, we look at those who barely make it paycheck to paycheck and see true happiness. Did they plan for it? Did they work for it?

In a manner of speaking, yes, they did. They planned time to be with their spouses, their children, their friends. Yes, they decided that chicken or black-eyed peas were just as good as the most expensive steak in nutrition. They decided picnics in the backyard could be just as much fun for a birthday party as hiring clowns and bounce houses. And they gave and received true happiness – time and themselves.

Looking For Happiness Alone

When the holidays pass and everyone returns home, many people are left alone. The comfort of visiting family and friends disappears and loneliness surfaces. For singles living without spouses, children, or other special people in our lives, the search for happiness becomes a year-long process.

It’s so easy to sit in a chair, mindless in front of a computer or television. Or, we might decide staying in bed late every day and going to bed early will help us sleep our way to the next family event.

However, for those strong of heart, getting up off our lazy, self-pitying selves is so much better. Getting up and out of the house, finding a life, interacting with others stops the looking inward and promotes looking outward.

Where to Look For Happiness

Where to look for happiness is the perpetual question. Look to yourself! What am I good at? Why did I enjoy doing that when I was younger? Where is my dream vacation? Ask these questions and more to move yourself from rocking chair to a rocking life. Revisit old joys. Get your hands dirty in a pottery class, learn cake decorating, go places, even day trips, DO something.  Get involved!

Within our small town, a music hall opened. One offering is line dancing lessons. It gives people a chance to meet each other socially. Another addition is the Cornerstone Coffee Shop, which has become a regular place for special events or just meeting a neighbor for a chat.

Computer sites such as https://www.meetup.com/ have lists of activities taking place in and around most towns. Small towns may have little or nothing, but nearby larger ones usually offer many ways to get together with people similar in interests. All of these are opportunities to meet new people, but only a person using them moves closer to happiness outside the boundaries of sitting alone at home. Happiness is in your hands and no one else’s.